


A fairy and a fire

by orphan_account



Category: Undertale, Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Bleh, F/M, Fire, M/M, Other, Swearing, The reader grows tea for a job, The word woman pops up once so uh idek, Whatever I don't care, bruh I don't even know at this point, but I mean I guess reader can be a guy idc, i mean idek how ur supposed to support urself with that money, it's a one shot, reader beats someone's ass, reader is a fairy, reader is implied to be female, theres swearing too, yeah a fairy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-28
Updated: 2016-11-28
Packaged: 2018-09-02 05:06:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8652139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: bruh I've got nothing better to do so whAt the hell
You wanna love a fukin fire through the eyes of a tea growing fairy? You GOT IT M80
yeah I think you can tell it's more of a shitpost





	

**Author's Note:**

> (y/n) - your name
> 
> like  
> who even likes this  
> I mean  
> I wrote this at 11 pm while ranting to my friend about string cheese and our imaginary chicken friend named Pollo who died of a tandoori grill  
> enjoy fuckers

Ah, Grillby's.

It's a pretty nice place, with lots of friendly patrons, whoopee cushions, and food.

Except, before, you've only heard of it through people who would pass by Waterfall. You couldn't actually go to Snowdin, because of your body not cooperating with the cold.

You were a fairy, and fairies thrived in warm and humid weather. Pretty much the exact opposite of Snowdin.

You've wanted to visit for quite a while.

Then you got an opportunity. Through a short, pudgy-looking skeleton. Sans the Skeleton.

You met each other at some part of Waterfall, by that lone bench sitting in a cave, by a random echo flower. He was there to leave a quiche there underneath the bench, which struck you as odd. Why would someone leave a perfectly good looking quiche under the bench to rot? Yet, you didn't question it. You were sure he had his reasons.

He didn't even notice you at first, until _you_ acknowledged him. He jumped back a little, clearly shaken.

"h-hey, kiddo, whatcha doin' here?"

Silence..

"..sitting? Plus, I'm not a kid. I'm an adult. If anything you look like the kid."

"...true."

He straightened up to his true height, a bit taller than you thought but still a dwarf. He extended a hand for you to shake.

"it's sans. sans the skeleton."

You paused for a moment, hesitant, then you took his hand. The quiet cove suddenly filled with a loud farting noise.

"Seriously?"

Sans' grin almost reached his eye sockets.

"yes."

"Alright then, my name is (y/n). (y/n) the fairy."

You let go of his hand.

"Now, I guess it's time for a little chit chat." You say, stretching your hands.

"Why are you leaving a perfectly good quiche out under the bench?

"why are you here alone and by yourself, examining and probably listening to an echo flower holding someone's wishes?"

..

"Touché."

And with that began a conversation. One that will lead to many.

\------

The first conversation eventually led to almost daily conversations by the bench, him always cracking a pun or two, you bringing mugs and boxes of tea for him to try.

Everything is purely platonic, because he somehow has a secret someone in his life that he refuses to tell you about. You'll mind his privacy though. 

One day, after talking about lots of types of tea (and that one time King Asgore himself passed by your shop and accidentally broke a tea set, then paying for it, apologizing profusely, and crying, simultaneously.), Sans decided he should take you to Grillby's.

"Sans, I've told you what will happen if you make me walk through Snowdin in the cold! I still can't afford a thick enough coat to actually go there."

"nah, i ain't gonna make you walk there. we'll go there through another way."

You raised your eyebrow. 

"Teleportation?" You questioned.

"right on." Sans clapped.

You've never actually tried to teleport with Sans, but you've seen him do it.

"You sure?"

"yeah, just hang on to me, then you'll be fine."

You did as he said, then everything went black, and the floor disappeared from your feet. It seemed like you were falling.Before you could scream, you landed in a cozy, fire-lit restaurant bar. A chorus of "Hey Sans"-es greeted the both of you.You still felt a bit woozy after teleporting.

"Ugh. Sans, you never warned me I'd feel dizzy after."

You fluttered your wings and stretched your legs just to make sure they still worked.

"heh, sorry pal. the effect's worn off on me, so I forgot."

"I can tell you knew, and you just hid it from me to see my reaction." You judged from the smug look in his eyes.

"ya got me. how can you read people that well bud? it's insane."

You just shrugged, and he led you up to the bar stool. Before sitting down in it, you took the whoopee cushion off. "Nice try." You sneered. Sans didn't say anything.

The bartender was apparently, a fire elemental. A very tall one. He must've towered over you by about half a foot. You weren't surprised, it certainly isn't your first time seeing a fire elemental. You waved and smiled. You caught him staring, but as soon as you waved at him he looked away.

"'ey grillbz, this was the fairy I talk to ya 'bout." He called. "So, you've talked to people here about me? How flattering." you giggled.

Sans completely ignored that, and ordered fries, a ketchup bottle, and some golden flower tea.

When the food came, Grillby, the fire elemental, only brought one basket of fries.

"Sans, didn't you get any for me?" You complained.

"well, when you're negotiating whether to share your french fries, you have quite a few bargaining chips."

"Sans, do not try me. Give me some." You reached for the basket. He pulled it away from you.

"Why can't you share??" You complained.

"well, no bones about it, im a skeleton who hates sharing a skele **ton** of my food. i yam what i yam."

"Those puns are staler than french fries left out for 2 days."

"you must be running a femur, because my puns are always humerus."

You huffed. "I give up. You win. Are you happy?"

 "yeeeeeppp." Sans' smile was almost comical, the edges of his mouth reaching his eye sockets, his eye lights the brightest you've ever seen them to be. He was really happy, huh?

You groaned and face-palmed "I just wanted something to eat, you know." You sipped your tea grumpily. "Fuck you." you mumbled.Suddenly, there was some odd, bonfire-like crackling. Like, really loud fire crackling. You immediately looked at Grillby.

Oddly enough, Grillby was doubled over, holding his stomach. The crackling was coming from him. You could see his mouth open, his mouth being a crescent of white in his flames. You found it very.. cool. Yeah, that wasn't the appropriate word to describe a monster made of fire but _seriously_. You had no other word to describe it. So the crackling was his laughing. You found it oddly.. cute?

_"Oh no. No no no, fuck, (your name) no. We've been over this."_

While you were internally scolding yourself, you didn't realize you were staring _at_ Grillby. After you noticed that you were staring, Grillby had already turned a shade of bright blue, not unlike an echo flower.

Shit.

Shit, shit, _shit_.

_"You done fucked up, (y/n)!"_

"hey, (y/n), I never knew you had **blue** magic! i thought only me and pap had that!" Sans snickered.

"Oh my god, shut the fuck up." You hissed, covering your blushing face.

You didn't notice Grillby left to the kitchen. Eventually, he came back with another basket of fries. He just left it there and then stealthily speed-walked back into the kitchen.

Everyone else who wasn't Sans, you, or Grillby, was either trying to look at the three of you stealthily, or was too drunk to care and tried to talk to you both about what just happened.

"Did you see what just happened? Oh my god, I think Grillby likes youuu....!" A drunken bird slurred next to you.

You ignored it and turned to Sans.

"What am I supposed to do? I actually like this place... I'm absolutely sure that every single time I come here, people are going to mention, well, _this_."

"don' worry, dude. i'll talk to him." Sans teleports away, presumably to the kitchen.

After about 30 minutes, Grillby emerged from the fire escape and Sans teleported back next to you.

Grillby whispers something to Sans. The short skeleton then turned to you and relayed Grillby's message;

"Sorry about that."

You looked up to the fire. "It's alright. It was partly my fault too."

"hey, (y/n). you are aware, it takes a while for grillbz to **warm** up to someone new. it's surprising, no?"

You just glared at him.

For a few minutes, it went on like that. Grillby told Sans his message, then Sans relayed it to you, then you just replied to Grillby. Eventually, the bar emptied, and it was only you three. Grillby was able to talk to you, albeit quietly. It went on, idle chit chat, like nothing happened. Soon, you had to go home. You promised Grillby you would visit again soon.

\----

And that you did. It's been almost a week since you've went there.

You finally got the money to get a coat. You went to Hotland, talked Muffet into sewing you a thick coat, and paid her a total of 1500 gold. You expected it. Muffet wanted to get her hands on any money she can find.

In a few hours, Muffet handed you a brand new coat that was surprisingly comfy. It was nice.

You couldn't stup rubbing the material even as you flew home. Sans agreed to meet you there at about 5 pm so you could fly there together. You were just gonna have to carry Sans for, as he phrases it, "a thanks for teleporting and getting grillbz out of the kitchen."

You couldn't disagree with that. He was light, and you were pretty strong anyways.

When you got to your little house in Snowdin, he was there waiting. You were already wearing your coat.

"Alright, are you ready?" You were hovering a foot off the ground, your wings propelling you.

"so, doll, how are we gonna go about this?"

"I'll bear hug your torso and just fly along as you hold on to me." You answered.

"sounds like a plan." Sans agreed.

"Ready?" You asked, and then grabbed Sans' torso, without him saying anything.

"Hang on!" Even before he got the chance to say anything, you sped off, flying as fast as you can to Snowdin.

"no, wait this is too fast- too fast!" Sans pleaded, and you pretended not to hear. In a five seconds, flat, you landed in the powdery snow in front of the establishment, and managed to make a giant snow cloud, the snow coating both you and Sans. You put Sans down, and opened the door for him. He seemed dizzy. You ushered him inside the restaurant, the fine snow that coated both of you melting off.

"How does it feel like to have a taste of your own medicine?" You questioned, while wringing out the coat and putting it on a nearby coat rack.

"not.. good.. feel sick.." Sans gurgled.

Oddly enough, people started greeting you. You've heard quite a number of "Hey (y/n)!"s when you entered. Also a couple of "Is Sans okay?"s. You waved to everyone inside while gently nudging Sans up to the counter. You plopped him in his customary seat, then you sat in yours, making sure there aren't any whoopee cushions.

"Hey Grillby!" You called. Grillby waved back, with only a hint of blue on his face. He came over and asked you if Sans was okay.

"He'll be alright. Just get him his ketchup, and he'll be fine." Sans had his head lolled on the counter, his skull actually looked paler. At that point, he finally got his head up, and swore.

"(y/n), you're an ass."

"Thanks, Sans."

...silence between the both of you.

"fine, i'll admit, i deserved what was coming for me."

"Yep, yeah you did."

Grillby raised an eyebrow. Or, at least, he looked like he was.

"I was holding him on the way here while flying really quickly. Maybe a bit _too_ quickly."

Grillby nodded in understanding.

Everything went along without a hitch. No one teased you or Grillby _too_ much. But as it got late into the night, and the crowd started to thin out, a rowdy group of monsters came in, the leader strutting in confidently. The leader was Aaron. Aaron. Yes, _that_ Aaron.

The one who would never stop calling monsters 'babe', 'baby', or 'bae'.

Also the one who will not stop flirting. You were in for a hell of a ride.

"Oh god. Here we go." You mumbled.

You looked at Sans and Grillby, and they also had varying degrees of disgust on their faces.

Aaron sashayed in, and sat. Beside. You.

So much for Drunk Bird™ not being there when they were needed the most.

"Hey babe, how are you doin? ;)" Aaron crooned.

You ignored him and continued quietly chatting with Grillby and Sans. Grillby was almost fuming, but he was trying his best not to let it show. The eye lights from Sans' eye sockets disappeared.

"Calm down, you two. I'm a grown woman, I can deal with it."

Grillby was called over by a group of Aaron's friends. When he came back he returned to the kitchen. Sans must have been fascinated with his ketchup bottle, because that was all he looked at.

"Awh, come on. No answer~?" Aaron prompted. He motioned to Grillby and ordered the strongest thing he had.

You turned to him.

"Leave me alone." You ordered him.

"Don't be like that, baby. ;) Come on, you'll have a great time with me." He downed the alcohol in one go.

Oh god. This douche disgusted you to the ends of the Earth, especially when drunk.

"I said, leave me alone." You turned back and continued chatting with Sans.

"Aw~, you don't mean that, do you, babygirl? ;) ;)" Aaron breathed, his breath smelling strongly of alcohol. His sycophants started cheering him on.

Your fist clenched around your own glass of (favorite drink). Grillby gave the group their food and is now trying his best not to melt the empty glass he was polishing. Sans was still looking at his ketchup bottle. He wasn't even making any puns. That was more than alarming.

"Do not call me baby girl, or babe. I don't like you."

But Aaron refused.

"But you are my babe. ;) I rented a room with a big bed in the inn, for twice the fun. Don't you want to join me? ;) ;)"

Then he groped your ass.

That was the last straw.

You socked him in the face just as fast as when you flew here to Grillby's a few hours ago. Aaron passed out, now unconscious.

He landed to the floor in a big thud, that happened to surprise everybody in the tiny room. It was so silent you can hear a pin drop. You, a puny fairy of about 5 feet, taking out the you muscle-y pervy Goliath.

You weren't even surprised.

"Well. Now that's taken care of." You remarked, matter-of-factly, while dusting off your hands and adjusting your shirt.

"Where were we?" You asked Sans. 

Instead of looking at the ketchup bottle, he looked at you. Then he started snorting.

"oh my god kid, that was the best. i don't think I can even top that; you set the bar too high." He held up a hand for you to give him a high five, and you did.

Everyone but Aaron's group suddenly burst out laughing, yelling out various things or congratulating you.

"Aaron just got DUNKED ON!"

"Great job (y/n)!"

"I got that down! I'm gonna post that on the UnderNet; people will LOVE it."

Grillby affectionately gave you a pat on your head. He gave you a basket of fries.

Aaron's group was protesting against you, saying that what you did was wrong. The regular bar patrons disagreed with them and said that Aaron had it coming. Without anything better to do, they dragged the still unconscious Aaron out and left.

Atleast they paid for their food and drinks.

Well, it went well after. Some of the people there even bought you some drinks and burgers and fries. You took the drinks and some of the food and gave the rest to Sans.

Eventually, everyone left, and the 3 of you were left. After half an hour of chatting (and puns, courtesy of Sans) after closing time, Sans decided he should go home.

"someone needs to read pap a bedtime story anywho."

"I should head back home as well. It's getting late." You agreed with Sans.

"Do you mind if I walk you home?" Grillby whispered. 

Your brow furrowed. "Are you sure? I live all the way in Waterfall."

"I'm sure."

"Well, if you want to. I'm not forcing you." You weren't convinced.

The tall bonfire nodded and went into the kitchen. While waiting for him, you put on your coat. He emerged with a coat similar to yours, boots, and an umbrella. The three of you walked out together and parted ways. You asked Grillby if he wanted to take the scenic route or the quick one.

"Scenic."

"Are you sure?"

He nodded. 

Okay then. Both of you started walking toward Waterfall.

"Why do you keep asking me if I'm sure?" Grillby questioned.

"Fire plus water equals not good. And Waterfall is full of water, hence its name. Also, rain."

"I go through Waterfall to visit Hotland, you know that right?"

"..Oh. Still." You protested.

"But, why do you want to walk me home? I don't live that far from Snowdin." You questioned.

"I want to apologize. About last time."

"You don't need to. I should apologize too." You assured him.

There was a moment of silence.

"Why were you staring at me?" You demanded.

"Why were you staring at me?" Grillby reiterated.

A second of silence.

"You first."

You both said, simultaneously.

"Well. This is.." You started.

"Odd." Grillby finished with a sigh.

"You go first." You looked up at him.

"Fine."

It was quiet. The dripping of the water was heard. You didn't realize that both of you stopped walking.

"Well?"

"You're nice."

Oh my god. How vague can you get?

"What do you mean?" You questioned.

"You look nice."

"Is that all?"

Grillby nodded. His flames where higher than normal and his face was almost entirely blue.

"It's my turn now."

He nodded again.

Be blunt, and get this over with. You got this.

"I think your laugh is cute." You smiled up at him.

"pfftt- oh my god that is great. this is going on the undernet."

You and Grillby turned to the source of the noise. Sans was sitting behind an echo flower, holding a camcorder up.

You sighed. There was no way in hell he was going to delete that. He was going to send it to _everyone_ he knows. You just know it.

"Grillby, I gotta go. See you." You gave him a quick hug and a slip of paper and quickly took off, flying up to the ceiling of the cave, disappearing among the sparkling crystals of the cave.

"ey, grillbz, that slip o' paper may or may not have her number. see ya."

And with that, the skelebro has taken his leave.

Grillby decided he should walk home.

So he did, thinking of what just happened the entire way.

 

**Author's Note:**

> If you got it all the way to here  
> Congrats you survived reading my shitty fanfic  
> I don't even know why I made this  
> Anyway  
> Thank and goodbye  
> Leave a kudos and a comment if you want  
> I don't care  
> (Yeah I do)  
> Thank and bye


End file.
